Scripture: (2 Sam 13:15 NKJV) Then Amnon hated her exceedingly, so that the hatred with which he hated her was greater than the love with which he had loved her. And Amnon said to her, "Arise, be gone!"
Observation: Amnon, son of David, fell in love with his step-sister Tamar and plotted to have her come to his house under the pretense of being sick. While there, he forced her, maybe even raped her, but having accomplished his evil plot he despised her and rejected her altogether.
Application: I wish more single young people, teens and single young adults, would read this story and learn that it follows the pattern or most pre-marital relationships. I think this is particularly important for young ladies who surrender their virginity early with the desire to show their boyfriend their love, for fear they will loose them if they reject their advances, or in the hope they will keep them even while he pulls away from them. Those who believe in evolution would say that man is the hunter and when they have caught their prey they loose interest in them. Those of us who believe in God believe that once a woman has surrendered what is most sacred to her, men loose respect for them, and therefore they have no more interest in them. While young man think that having premarital sex will bring them closer together, more often than not it becomes an insurmountable barrier.
Several years ago there was an article in Time magazine about the report by the National Marriage Project, out of Rutgers University in New Jersey, which says that, “Cohabitating couples are more likely to experience a host of domestic problems — including, if they finally get marriage, divorce.
Last year in the U.S., more than 4 million unmarried heterosexual couples shacked up, in contrast to only half a million at the end of the supposedly free-spirited ‘60's. Though living together has become conventional, the report cites studies showing that these unions, in comparison to marriages, tend to have more episodes of domestic violence to women and physical and sexual abuse of children. It notes that annual rates of depression among unmarried couples are more than three times those of married couples.
The report contends that cohabitation reduces the likelihood of later wedded bliss. It quotes a 1992 study of 3,300 adults showing that those who had lived with a partner were 46% (it is now known to be 80%) more likely to divorce than those who had not. ‘The longer you cohabit, the more tolerant you are of divorce,’ says David Popenoe, the sociologist who co-wrote the study. ‘You are used to living in a low-commitment relationship, and it’s hard to shift that kind of mental pattern.’”
Premarital sex and premarital cohabitation do not benefit the relationship; instead, it will bring a host of problems, challenges, and difficulties including not marrying the person with whom they had intercourse or with whom they live, including abuse to them or their children, and ultimately divorce. God’s plan for sex after marriage is best and healthiest and provides the best chances for lasting happiness.
A Prayer You May Say: Father, bless the young and single who are tempted to enter into relationships and practice premarital sex and help them to not fall into a sin which will bring about life-lasting difficulties and challenges. May they enjoy the best and healthiest of relationships before and after their wedding.
Used by permission of Adventist Family Ministries, North American Division of Seventh-day Adventists.
